Destabilize
by bornunderabadsign
Summary: Becker's job is to protect the team, on the night that he almost losses Abby to a raptor he realizes he's in love with her, with this new found attraction makes both their worlds tilt on it's axis. I dare all Jecker and Secker fans to read this.
1. Cat and Mouse

_"Lust is to the other passions what the nervous fluid is to life; it supports them all, lends strength to them all ambition, cruelty, avarice, revenge, are all founded on lust." - Marquis de Sade_

**[Abby and Connors Flat – 10:00 p.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

Connor was working late (possibly overnight) again at the ARC working on something Phillip had given him to do. I felt more than a little disappointed that he wasn't here with me – honestly, he should be considering less than 24 hours ago I had come dangerously close to becoming raptor kibble.

I was standing at the kitchen sink washing my dishes from the complicated pasta recipe I had made for myself. It was when I was putting the last plate away that I got a icy chill down my spine…that primordial almost paranoid feeling that you get when you know you're being watched.

Slowly I turned around to glance into the living room that was illumined faintly from the light in the kitchen – I discovered that my instincts had been correct, there was something watching me … it was Becker.

He was lounging on the couch looking very relaxed; his gaze bore into mine, his brandy brown eyes stormy, hair a little bit disheveled than I was use to seeing, he was wearing jeans and a black t-shirt. He had a smirk on this lips that I really hadn't seen on him before.

Seeing him sitting there I only suffered minor heart attack. Any person with a normal functioning brain would cry out in terror at having a guy come into your house unannounced, still, I didn't cry out because…well…it's Becker. We started at each other for I don't know how long, that smirk never left his lips.

"Uh…can I help you?" I asked feeling exquisitely stupid, not that I could help it – he was starting to make me nervous.

"I decided that you and I should talk." He said in that military deadpan of his.

It was at this precise moment that I became aware of what I was wearing…or to put it more accurately- what I wasn't. I was only in my underwear and a flimsy tank top.

"Uh, sure, just let me go get something on…" I explained taking a few retreating steps back.

"Please don't change simply on my account." His already deep voice turned practically baritone.

I involuntarily gulped; it always unsettled me when he used _that_ tone.

**Authors Note:**** There are not many Abby/Becker parings, in my opinion I think the apparent tension coupled with the apparent affection you see between them in the many episodes would make for a very interesting relationship **

**Thank you for reading. **


	2. Like A Puma

_"The principles of lust... are easy to understand. Do what you feel... Feel until the _end." - Enigma

**[Abby and Connor's Flat – 10:20 p.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

I shivered remembering the last time he had used _that_ tone of voice with me.

_-Flashback –_

_I stood with my back against the pillar, trying not to breathe too heavily, desperately trying to clam my rapidly beating heart. _

"_Well done, you've just alerted ever predator for miles." I rage at Becker. _

"_We'll I didn't have much choice did I Abigail." He seethed back. _

I psychologically shook off the unpleasant memory – at the same time asking myself why on earth I was feeling so apprehensive about Becker being in my flat.

At that moment I made a decision then that I wasn't going to be frightened by the situation. Besides I had no real reason to be, he had put his life on the line to protect me countless times (the most recent being the raptor event) – I owed him my unconditional and permanent trust.

Letting out a sigh I spoke nonchalantly pointedly turning away from his smoldering gaze. "You can help yourself to the bar that's on your left, please excuse me for a second."

Then turning on my heel I went into the bedroom to slip into something more appropriate. I didn't change my top but I put on some pajama pants.

While I was making myself look more put together and presentable I kept my mind occupied by trying to figure out how in the hell he had gotten into the flat without making any noise. Ex military or not it shouldn't have been that easy. I know for certain that no doors were unlocked, because whenever I am home alone I make sure they are locked.

Still musing over the mystery, I looked in the mirror, satisfied at how I was now – I made my way back into the kitchen. All the lights had been turned off except for one lamp in the living room, Becker was still sitting in a very self assured way, and his hair was even a bit messier giving him a rakish look –now there were two wine glasses half full and a bottle of Merlot right beside them.

Giving him a ridiculously shy smile I sat down on the couch next to him at a distance that was close but not too close – picking up one of the glasses of wine.

"So…what exactly compelled you to drop in to see me?" I questioned innocently taking a sip of the wine, it was bitter with a delicious sweet after bite. Becker shifted over a fraction closer to me taking a sip from his own glass.

"As I said before, I thought that we should talk. Oh by the way, you should get bars on your basement window." He smirked taking another sip.

'_Well that explains the 'how', but I am still confused about the why - what exactly could Becker want to talk about that was so important that he felt the need to practically break into my flat... that's what a bloody 'front door' with a nice doorbell is for.' _I thought, bravely holding my tongue.

I noticed that Becker was looking directly at me again, his eyes discreetly yet noticeably giving me a onceover

"How are you feeling?" he finally asked. I offered him a smile.

"I am feeling better, still a bit sore thou…" The dish washer beeped cutting me off midsentence. "Excuse me." I got up to quickly go unload it.

While I was doing that, I didn't hear Becker come up behind me, he moved with the grace of a puma. One second I was putting away the larger dishes, and the next Becker had me pinned against the refrigerator –my arms were pinned above my head by one of his hands and his pelvis pressing against mine. With his free hand he wrapped it around my neck, forcibly pulling me into a kiss.

**Authors note: ****Thank you so much for reading. Another update will be coming soon.**


	3. Visual hallucinations?

_Do visual hallucinations make noise? – Me_

**[Abby and Connor's Flat – 11:05 p.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

His lips pressed against mine roughly and I found myself responding to his kiss…I wasn't even trying to push him away, I wasn't even while my brain was practically screaming Connor's name.

The front door opened and closed, Becker broke the kiss – to my absolute horror I let out a slight moan, resting his cheek against mine he growled, the sound was so animalist and primal a shiver of odd delight went through me.

"Oi Abby, you here?" Connor called out.

Becker had already let go of me and I sagged against the refrigerator, he swiftly walked over opening the door leading out onto the balcony. In one swift movement he vaulted over the railing – leaving the door wide open and the curtains moving with the slight breeze.

Connor walked into the room, "Abby you ok?" He asked his voice worried.

I almost laughed, _'actually no Connor I'm not alright, after almost being killed by a raptor Becker broke into our flat and practically forced me to kiss him – at the rate he was just going I don't think he would have just stopped at a kiss…then when you came in he proceeded to jump off our balcony. So…how was your day honey?' _I played with the idea of telling him all this but then thought better of it.

I turned to look at him, feeling like a deer caught in headlights "Uh…yeah." squeaked. Connor gave me a smile as he dropped his shoulder bad, walking over to the balcony door he shut it – still being a little bit shocked on a number of levels I simply stood where I was.

Connor looked quizzically at the living room table seeing the two glasses of wine.

"Had company?" He innocently asked. When I saw the glasses, the little treads of hope that the whole past hour had been some really vivid and elaborate hallucination brought on by something I ate, touched, or inhaled, vanished from my mind.

"Yeah a mate came over." I explained, my voice calmer, I turned back to the sink, my composure coming back to me in increments. Connor walked up behind me – putting his hand on my hip he kissed my cheek softly.

"I'm heading to bed…you coming soon?" He asked walking towards our bedroom as I turned back to look at the living room.

I had a sudden impulse to giggle, amazingly I suppressed it. "Yeah…I'll be there in second." I responded, my eyes never leaving the balcony door.

**Authors Note:**** Now, can you imagine how awkward tomorrow at the ARC is going to be?**


	4. As You Wish

"_As you wish." - Westley, The Princess Bride_

**[ARC – 6:00 a.m.]**

**-Becker's Point of View –**

I had been writing a letter to Abby all morning, after last night I had figured out that, yes – at least on some basic level, she did want me as well - if that moan she let out when I broke our kiss was anything to go by.

My first tactic had been to go after her relentlessly until she yielded to me – however, now I am going to try and get her to come to me of her own accord, I finished the letter and sealing it I put it in her locker for her to find.

**[ARC – 7:00 a.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

****When we drove up into the car park Connor got out and went right in, I let him go ahead. I got out of the car and leaned against of the driver's-side door trying to get my courage to go in.

How was I going to handle seeing Becker? What if he tries something today? Would he try something at the ARC? Would I mind if he tried something? What if I lose all control and jump on him instead of the other way around? Did I just admit that? Do I want that?

'_ARGH!'_ I screamed mentally. I pushed off the car and headed in, I was glad that I didn't see Becker right away. I went to my locker and opened up, the first thing I noticed was a letter taped to the inside of the door. The only word on the front of the letter was 'Abigail' – it was in Becker's handwriting.

"You have got to be kidding me." I mumbled looking around me seeing that there was no one near; carefully I took the letter down and opened it.

_Abigail- _

_I want to tell you about the first time I knew I felt something for you beyond friendship or workplace acquaintance. Please to remember back to over a year ago when Danny and Sarah were still with us. You had just saved a dracorex from a lance injury. I remember when I came in and saw Sir William holding that sword to your throat. I had never been so scared in my entire life – that is the moment that I knew I was in love with you. Even Sarah's pleading to stop me from shooting William because it may alter everything didn't seem to have an effect – I was going to kill him before he hurt you in spite of the consequences if it came down to it. I would have then and still would kill for you. I am a slave to you now; anything you ask of me I will gladly do._

_Yours Eternally, Becker. _

I leaned against the wall, my legs having gone weak. I took the letter and reread it then put it back in the envelope and put it in my back pocket.

Has Becker lost his mind? There are times where I swear we could never stand one another and now all of a sudden out of the blue he is declaring his undying love for me. There had to be a mistake – he was just jerking my chain

I marched into the armory – going with an educated guess I knew he would be there. Miraculously Becker was alone.

"Becker!" My tone was sharp he turned around giving me a soft look.

I decided to call him on his bluff, I have him an evil smile. "Becker, shoot yourself with your stun gun." I challenged – going with the first thing that came to mind.

He gave me a pained look. "For proof? As you wish." He pulled out his gun turning it to face his chest.

Oh shit, he is serious.

"Becker, no, STOP!" I cried.

In one swift movement he put the gun down. "When I said anything Abby, I did mean anything – I am yours." He soothed, his voice just a little bit above a whisper. My heart speed up until I was sure it would explode.

The alarm blared, and for once in my life I was glad to have an anomaly open.


	5. It Can Always Get Worse

_**Authors note:**__** Thank you so much for the reviews :), in this chapter things are about to change drastically for Becker, Abby, and Connor.**_

**[Astride the River Thames – 10:00 a.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

Its times like this that I often consider a job change, I was running along the River Thames after having my gun unfortunately ripped from my grasp, and guess what is chasing me? A giant prehistoric crocodile, it's actually called a Sarcosuchus, not that it mattered at the moment. Seriously – yesterday the raptor and now a crocodile, I feel slightly picked on.

The Sarcosuchus was gaining on me; I turned down a road way…the wrong one apparently.

It lead to a dead end… I turned and faced the crocodile.

Before I could even register it, Becker had rounded the corner; he EMD'd the large reptile.

"Abigail where is your gun!" Becker yelled coming at me… his anger took me so off guard that for a moment I thought I may have been better off facing the crocodile.

He kept walking towards me, forcing my back against the wall, his face only inches from mine. "Are you actually trying to get yourself killed, or me, or Connor, or anyone else who would try and save you? I'm starting to think you really don't care if any of us get hurt."

At that last comment I full on backhanded him across the cheek, hard enough that a sharp pain went through my hand. It silenced him as his head snapped to the side, after a moment - he looked back at me all anger had drained from his face – sadness and worry were all that remained.

"Abigail, god, I'm…" He started, I pushed on past him – when he grabbed onto my arm stopping me I turned very deliberately and faced him.

"Let. Go. Of. Me. Becker" I demanded in slow drawn out words, hearing myself speak it sounded like it really wasn't me talking, the voice was so cold and detached.

Becker let go instantly, turning my back on him I started walking down the street. After a while I decided to drop my black box in a rubbish bin when next I saw one. I kept on walking aimlessly for hours, feeling like a zombie.

It was starting to get dark that I came upon a place that I recognized, I looked around with growing comprehension, this place had been the plaza where Connor and I were found.

_-Flashback-_

_I was on my stomach lying on the ground, but for some reason I was overjoyed to feel concrete instead of dirt below me._

_I looked up and saw a pair of black boots approach me._

"_I hope you brought me a souvenir." I almost didn't recognize Becker's voice._

_He held out his hand and I took it, when I saw him – his expression was one of relief and joy. I wrapped my arms around his neck, oddly comforted by his solid presence. In that moment I had felt safer than I had in a long time._

I shook myself out of the memory, I now had a definite place I knew I wanted to go – that I had to go. I knew about the possible consequences of these actions, I'm willing to face them head on if I have too.

**[Becker's Flat – 9:00 p.m.]**

**-Becker's Point of View –**

It had been hours sense someone had seen Abby, I found her black box in a rubbish bin 4 miles from where I had last seen her, I was starting to get worried. I didn't want to over react – but I think almost a full day is a bit long to be gone.

I was home getting something to eat – when I was done chances were I would get in my car and drive all night if I had to, I was going to find Abby. A knock came from the door, frowning slightly I put down the sandwich I was eating and answered it.

Abby was standing in my doorway, looking tired and worn for wear.

"Abby?" I questioned, clearly startled by her unexpected presence at my door.

Tears formed in her eyes when I looked directly into them.

"Becker…" she whimpered, leaning in and wrapping her arms around my neck – hugging me close. In less than a second I returned the hug with just as much force. I loved the feeling of being close to her. I put my hands under the lower part of her shirt. As my hands spread across the soft skin of her lower back, she gave a little gasp of pleasure as I pressed her even more firmly against me.

"I love you." She confessed, her voice somewhat muffled by my shirt. Hearing those words coming from _her_ caused me to become dangerously lightheaded.


	6. What My Instincts Tell Me

_**Authors note:**__** Thank you so much for the reviews :) nice to know that people agree that Becker needed to be slapped ;).**_

**[Becker's Flat – 9:00 p.m.]**

**-Becker's Point of View –**

Those simple words were enough to stop me. I stood there holding onto her for a long time and she let me keep her there. After a while she whispered in my right ear.

"Becker, let's go inside." Her voice sent waves of pleasure through my body.

Picking her up off the ground I took a few steps back into my flat, kicking the door closed.

I set her back down on her feet. I gazed down at her, and she stared back, her blue eyes looking darker in the dim light of the room. She started to pull away from me, but I didn't move from where I was nor did I let her go. Her eyes still were lipid from the tears.

It was in that moment an incomprehensible tension between us flared, with the upmost care and deliberation our lips met. The kiss was slow, filled with meaning and intent. We pulled apart and were drawn back again, the kiss intensifying – our hands exploring each other with care.

I sucked in a breath as her hand started unbuttoning my shirt. With a heroic amount of self restraint I stopped her.

"Abigail, you can slow down, I'm not going anywhere." I reassured.

She looked at me carefully, then standing on her toes he kissed me again, fiercer.

The kiss was so raw and hungry that I am sure my blood pressure rose well beyond where it should have been.

The kiss lasted for a long time; soon we both had to come up for air.

"Becker." She asked breathless.

"Abby?" My voice husky with the response.

"I can't take this slow." She explained, still out of breath.

Screw it.

"Neither can I." I agreed before kissing her roughly – letting my hands go where they pleased.

**[Becker's Flat – 4:30 a.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

I awoke with a start, bolting upright in bed for a moment confused about where I was.

It was dark outside; the windows were open with the nearly full moons light flooded into the room

I pulled my legs up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, I turned to look at my bedmate.

Becker was fast asleep, looking calm and relaxed, the covers had gathered at his waist leaving his bare chest exposed.

My eyes wandered over his lean and muscular body… then my mind wandered to the subject of Connor and my heart sank.

'_Oh god, Connor, oh lord what have I allowed to happen.'_


	7. The Term Coward

_Authors Note:__ Thank you for reading and reviewing. Now we get to the morning after. _

**[Becker's Flat – 6:30 a.m.]**

**-Abby's Point of View –**

The second time I woke up Becker was gone – after a second he came back into the room, dressed in his pants with no shirt on.

I pulled the covers up against me, hiding my chest from his view.

He noticed this and gave me a confused smirk. "You weren't exactly bashful last night Abby; I have already seen you naked and enjoyed what I saw immensely."

I bushed looking away.

"Becker last night was a…mistake." My voice shook as I looked back at him, he didn't look surprised.

He sighed aloud. "Abigail, I have feelings for you and you have feelings for me, last night we were just going with our impulses and natural desires."

"I love Connor." I retorted, the words didn't even seem to phase him.

"I know you do, but you love me also." He declared it like it was a simple fact, which it was – but I wasn't going to even go there.

"Are you familiar with the term 'delusional'?" I retorted.

Becker instantly responded, "Are you familiar with the term 'coward'?"

His self-assured tone was starting to piss me off. "Please turn around why I get on my clothes." I asked, and for the first time I registered hurt in his face, but without another word he turned around, quickly I got dressed.

I made my way past Becker and into his front entry, he started following me.

"Abby please don't leave." Be begged his voice cracking, I had to fight the impulse not to stay, without another word I left.

I walked home - it was only about 3 miles away, getting there I opened up the front door attempting to quietly make my way inside.

"Abby!" Connor called as I heard him rushing into the room. I looked over and he came running to me, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into a huge hug.

"Bloody hell Abby where have you been I have been going out of my mind with worry." He asked after pulling away, he held my face in his hands looking into my eyes.

"I…I'm sorry Connor." Was all that I could get out, we looked at each other for a moment, and not demanding any more of an explanation Connor kissed me deeply and pulled me into his arms again embracing me strongly.

"Please don't do that again Abby." He implored against my neck, I simply hugged him tighter, and kissing him on the cheek I apologized again.

I closed my eyes – enjoying the simple familiarity of being held in Connors arms, without warning a memory flash though my mind…

_Becker and me in his bed, him kissing me roughly and rolling me over onto my back pressing his body against mine as I let out a cry of pleasure. _

__Luckily Connor couldn't see the blush on my cheeks at the memory.


	8. Intelligent Creatures

_Authors Note:__ Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. Now, let's raise the stakes a bit shall we…_

**[The ARC – The Following Day]**

**-Abby's Point Of View-**

The next day at the ARC we were immediately called out to an open anomaly located in central London. It was in a mall, Connor, Becker and I made our way inside as Matt went around evacuating the entire place.

Becker had been pointedly ignoring me all day – not that I blame him but he was doing it so it was obvious to anyone who was paying attention, lucky Connor has been distracted and hasn't noticed anything yet. However Matt had noticed – asking me if there was some conflict that needed to be resolved, I didn't like having to lie to him, but I didn't trust him enough to tell him what was really going on. And for the first time in a long time I wished I had a friend (It would need to be a girl) with whom I could share my troubles with.

We located the anomaly and Becker quickly set up the equipment and closed it.

"Do you think anything came through?" I asked Becker.

He let out a soft sigh. "I don't know Abby." I looked up at him, all happiness in me nearly died. Until now I just hasn't noticed how the hardness of his expression had gone into his eyes – his light brown eyes stared back into mine, utterly devoid of emotion.

Stepping forward I peered into those eyes desperately searching for the warmth that had always been present in his eyes. I found none – nothing but cold hardness. I stepped forward… "Beck…" I started but was cut off by a commotion going on in the other end of the store. Becker snapped right into military mode.

"Abby stay here with the anomaly, Connor come with me." He commanded starting to make his way to check out the noise. Connor passed me giving my shoulder an affectionate squeeze; soon I was standing utterly alone.

The one Thing that had always amazed me is just how intelligent some animals can be – something I think we can never truly know just how smart they are. I was alone, an easy target, I didn't even hear the creature come up behind me.

**-Becker's Point Of View-**

We made our way to the side of the store, I was still upset at Abby – her emotional mood shifts were starting to give me whiplash. I knew she cared for me, but to what degree I didn't know, why isn't she interested in what I have to offer?

Connor and I searched the area I was positive the noise had come from, there was nothing there – nothing even looked like it had been disturbed.

"Abby…do you see anything from your position?" I called out, there was no reply.

"Abby?" Connor called after a moment, meeting each other's gaze worry passed between us. Without speaking we jogged back to the anomaly…it was still closed but there was no Abby.

"Becker…" Connors voice was strained and hitched; looking over at where he was looking the very blood in my veins froze. There was a chilling amount of blood pooled on the floor, and Abby's delicate silver necklace that she sometimes wore was lying in the middle of it.

"Abigail!" I cried out looking around, hoping to hear her voice, there was only silence.

_To be Continued… _


	9. Destroyed Lives

_Authors Note:__ Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, sorry this took me so long to update my muse wasn't with me on this story. _

**[Somewhere in London]**

**-Connor's Point Of View-**

I wonder if Becker and Abby think I'm stupid, I'm practically the one behind the internal workings of the ARC, do they really think that I don't know that they are doing things behind my back.

I figured out a few weeks ago that there was something going on between Becker and Abby – the looks that passed between them when they think that no one is looking, the fact that on more than one occasion Abby has come home smelling like Becker. And the fact she seems to have lost interest in sleeping with me.

I don't want to let Abby go…I have been holding onto her as hard as I can, and I will stay with her until she can look me in the eyes and tell me that she feels nothing for me. Even after she can say that I will still be willing to fight for her.

Becker, Matt and I have split up looking for Abby.

I had to keep telling myself that she was ok, it was the only way that I was able to keep on going, just try and ignore the huge amount of blood on the ground. She had to be alright, I don't think I could live if she isn't.

**-Becker's Point Of View-**

I am world's biggest idiot, why couldn't I see and accept the hard internal battle that she was fighting. She loved Connor, anyone could see it – after spending all that time in the cretaceous period, trying to pull away from him must have been hard.

I looked over to the side of me at the river Thames, to the stairs going down to the water…I saw a hand showing above the top step.

"Abby?" Running over I rounded the corner, stopping suddenly I dropped my gun at the sight of her, her shirt and the stairs stained red.

She was torn to shreds. "God no! Abigail." I cried dropping to my knees pulling her into my arms, burying my head into her neck I sobbed, a memory coming back to me.

_Abby looked up into the mirror letting out a sigh._

'_You can do this Abby." I reassured, she looked at me in the reflection, determination settling on her face. _

_She walked over to the dracorex. Turning to me she asked for my help. I was honored she trusted me, as I moved closer to her, I smelled strawberries on her – I liked strawberries. _

Time passed without me knowing, the next thing I was aware of was Matt pulling on my arm.

"The medics can help her Becker, but you need to let go of her." Matt pleaded, pulling away tears still coming I looked up as two medical personals started to take her away.

After a moment I looked over to the side of me only see Connor looking at me, our gaze met – at that moment looking into his eyes I knew that he knew everything.

"I love her." I said, making it come out like an apology.

"So do I." He responded with malevolence, before standing up and jumping into the back of the ambulance to go with her to the hospital.

"I'm sorry Connor…" I apologized to the empty space; it was at that point that I realized that cared about his feelings as well, I felt like I had destroyed two lives.


End file.
